Finally! Canon is done and the ships ended like we all expected after HBP. Ho-hum. I didn't bother reading Deathly Hallows - fanfiction is so diverse and interesting and well written nowadays that my taste of canon is completely gone. Now that DH has come and gone, us fanfic writers can get on with the important stuff.
My priority is Hermione. If she must ship at all (let's face it, how many of us ended up with our childhood flames?), I'd prefer it to be with Harry (or Remus or Draco) but as long as she's with someone who deserves her, I'm cool with it. That that someone could be Ron is ludicrous. Ron is stupid, lazy, and does not appreciate Hermione's Muggle background. He does not put his foot in his mouth by accident - he says what he means. And when he says something that hurts Hermione, he means to hurt her. Here's a good conversation by MrIntel in Saving Harry Potter :
"Who?" Hermione asked. "Ron? Absolutely. Sometime in the distant past, he
might have been an option, but I just can't see us going anywhere
past snogging and groping."
Ginny snorted. "There's something to be said for snogging," she said
flippantly and sat on the bed next to Hermione. "But you're
probably right; he's too much of a git to deserve someone like you.
He needs someone more... shallow - someone who'll be able to
tolerate his immaturity."
Harry's toleration of Ron is his biggest problem in canon, and one of the reasons that I don't really feel - if you stick strictly to canon evidence (even excluding that stupid joke of a book called HBP, not to mention DH) - that even Harry's good enough for Hermione. The only person in canon that could be good enough for her is, despite the age difference, Remus. Many fanfic writers get around the age difference by sending Hermione back in time to the Marauder era. But then they make the mistake of shipping her with Sirius. Now, Sirius is an ok bloke, but I've never been able to understand why Hermione would ever pick Sirius
Speaking of Remus, I can't understand
why Lily would ever date James over him - the only answer I can think
of is that Remus was ashamed of his werewolf self and pushed Lily away. And yes, I do consider Lily and Hermione to have a lot in common, which is why I never understand this whole Potters-and-redheads shit. Unless Potter males are superficial hormonic bastards like 80 percent of all males, they are far more likely to be attracted to smart witches who stand up for what they believe. Hermione and Lily are very much in that category, while Ginny never will be. They are women, while Ginny is a girl.
A note on Ms E.C.D.Watson - Emma isn't Hermione, but has done incredibly well to portray her. I hope she has successful careers at whatever she wants to do - philosophy at Cambridge today, becoming the next female Prime Minister of Britain or Keira tomorrow. Most importantly though, we wish her luck at finding happiness and contentment. Cheer up, Em, there's guaranteed to be one non-intimidatable worthy bloke out there... I'd suggest you take up rock climbing as a hobby :)
Finally, a few last words before we get to the awards ceremony...
This is a listing of fics where Hermione Jane Granger plays a starring or co-starring role.
The images and manips shown here are by mmefleiss, evernight, dhfreak, womanlikeme and the French Post Office. Click on them to see where they come from.
If there was a top ten list for Potter fanfics, this would be among them. The plot is good, there is no gratuitous angst, the writing brilliant, and the dialogue sparkling, and the character development better than canon. The series begins with Ron dead, Ginny not a bitch, Harry and Hermione remaining firmly best friends and dating other people while living in a house with four other friends - the unlikely combination of Justin Finch-Fletchley, George Weasley, Cho Chang, and OC Laura Chant.
'Show that Never Ends' also has the most definitive HHr quote in fanfiction. Curiously enough, the speaker is Ginny, who once dated Harry several years earlier and is still friends with both Harry and Hermione : "Harry and I were always just friends, and we convinced ourselves that we felt more. You and Harry were always in love, and you convinced yourselves you were just friends."
"Honey, remember when we were talking about moving back to London? Let's talk it about again," Harry said to Hermione, winking.
"You can't move back to London, who'd provide endless fodder for my witty repartee?" Justin protested.
"Oh, Justin. You could make witty repartee about the parlor sofa," Hermione said. She put a hand on her chest and rolled her eyes heavenward in an eerily accurate imitation of Justin. "'Dahling, we must discuss that slipcover. How many times do I have to tell you that sea-foam green is not your color? Friends don't let friends wear brocade, you know. I mean, really...it's just so Margaret Thatcher.'"
By the time she was done the entire table was holding their stomachs with laughter.
Angstiest RHr to HHr fic : The Paradise Series by AngieJ a.k.a. Ebony.
I read Trouble in Paradise (Book 2) and would never read it again because I'd be crying too much. And I'd never dare read Paradise Lost (Book 1) because my tear ducts would be permanently damaged. Brilliant stuff : see Linsenmayer's List for some summaries. The main story in TiP is happy enough but its flashbacks (to Paradise Lost) that are angsty and make you want to murder someone for the amount of lost HHr time.
Best Explanation of The Farce That Was HBP : Harry Potter and the Demon's Soul by Hotaru a.k.a. Angry Hermione.
To the surprise of no-one sensible, Ginny used a love potion in
HBP. Except it was a lot more complicated than that, and the Golden
Duo need the help of an orphaned half-demon girl with special dietary
requirements (rat, yummy) to break the spell and get on with the task
of killing Voldemort.
Luna sums it up best when she says, "you are a powerful witch
Ginny, but Hermione is like a bonfire to your candle.".
Both Harry and Hermione are given Auror training while at Hogwarts, to the point
where Hermione can kill Greyback without a wand and not feel
particularly guilty about it. Also has other ships - including the
most unusual and unlikely ship involving Neville ...
Definitely not for anyone under 18 (or under 21 in some countries
or under 101 if your mother is as Mollyish as mine was).
Post-HBP. Hogwarts has reopened with only fifty or so
students, and the trio are not among them. Harry faces Voldemort,
Hermione's right behind him, and the youngest Weasleys display
remarkable maturity by realizing that they can't have a relationship
with someone in love with someone else. (Not sure if I've got the category title correct here, it's been a while since I read this.)
Oneshot that best expresses a HHr shippers answer to the question of why Hermione would ever do something as desperate as dating Ron : Bad Timing by Dai Llwelyn.
Naturally, it has Hermione telling Harry, 'My, you are dim.'
Fic Involving the Most Trust : Tears of the Phoenix
I hesitate in calling this HHr, but it does centre around
Harry-Hermione interaction. The amount of trust involved here goes
far beyond that in a mere relationship. Whether it's justified or not... that would be telling.
Hermione betrayed the Light. She let Voldemort into
Hogwarts. Voldemort controls Hogwarts. The Order is scattered in
refugee camps. They curse her name; she is the greatest traitor, she is the Pettigrew of her generation.
She does not deny that she betrayed them. Then, why oh why, does Harry
want to trust her? No-one else does. Hermione certainly doesn't.
Best "Summer At the Grangers" fic : Vox Corporis by Miss Ann Thropic.
One of the few fics that can compete with the Paradigms Saga in
terms of character development. The author has a nice style of writing
Hermione was on the couch dressed in sweat pants and Harry's
old, worn Quidditch T-shirt. It was practically thread-bare, the
maroon was more a sickly purple, the gold a dingy yellow, and the
letters spelling out "POTTER" on the back were almost unreadable.
But it was Hermione's favorite and she intended to wear the shirt
until it literally fell off of her. She'd said as much. Harry hoped
he was there when it happened.
Here's a scene where Harry's defending Hermione from a childhood bully of hers - a blonde bombshell called Sam - while he's staying with the Grangers over the summer...
"You were right about one thing, however," he continued, still addressing Sam. "You said that you and I were not in the same league as her. Well... they say to aim for the stars. I think I might have just caught one this time."
Sam began to laugh derisively. "Oh my God, Harry! What, are you pulling this out of some bad poetry book?"
Harry cast a quick glance at Hermione, who unfortunately wore a look that confirmed the cheesiness of what he'd just said. He was on a roll now, however, so he wasn't going to let that stop him.
"Well, I guess that just goes to show that Hermione's the kind of girl that can inspire a bloke to write bad poetry."
Harry looked again and now Hermione wore a smirk and raised eyebrow that silently said, "Nice save!"
Emboldened by Hermione and annoyed by Sam, Harry turned back to the blonde. "Tell me. Have you inspired anyone to write anything about you? I mean, besides on the walls in the boys' loo?"
Best Hermione Kills Her Dad Fic : Harry Potter and the Unbreakable Link by Silvestria.
It begins with Hermione doing some holiday research in Greece and
running for her life... she really could use an Invisibility Cloak. At
the same time, Harry's dreaming that a girl running needs such a
cloak, and gives it to her. He wakes up, the cloak's gone, and Hermione
returns it to him on September first.
And that's just one symptom of his link with Tom Riddle's Muggle-raised daughter.
Best Crookshanks POV : Must Be Approved By Crookshanks by Plumgirl.
This would be the traditional Harry-and-Hermione-dance-around-each-other-for-years fic, with a touch of You've got Mail, except that it's told from Crookshanks' point of view. The Crookshanks-Hedwig dialogue is fairly amusing.
Best 'Where Did This Child Come From?' Fic : Tuesday's Child by Goreandbeans.
(Still heading in an HHr direction, not there yet.) Hermione went
to Beauxbatons. She's a brilliant academic who is suddenly mistaken
for a baby wizard's mother. She can't get rid of it, and her attempts
to do so lead to an angry confrontation with the Boy Who Lived. As she
is thrust kneedeep in nappies and bottles, she finds that her
miserably unsuccessful house elf activism at school has inspired a new
faction of civil rights activists who now wish to turn the wizarding
world around... and are capable of doing so. Meanwhile, rumour has it
that the child is Harry's - she really didnt have that in mind when
she named the baby James after James and The Giant Pumpkin... but
meeting Harry for walks in the park with little James help in
dispelling the rumours...
HHr Fic I'd most like to see resurrected: HP and the Secret Within by Shentaro.
Harry is injured so badly at (not by) the Dursleys that he should be dead. But he isn't - thanks to an illegal spell that can't even be found in the Restricted Section. Naturally, Hermione cast it. And now everyone seems to be against them. 40 000 words by March 2006.
Best Trio-Auror Oneshot : Balance by Crazy Mishka.
(Features a Hermione who didn't go to Hogwarts.) Harry and Ron are a successful Auror team. They don't need a third member. They get one. She's called Hermione. Alright, maybe they could use a third member.
"You want someone who doesn¯²t need to be in the spotlight, but like your mother someone who can¯²t help but interfere when she sees something wrong because she is as compassionate as that. You want someone to talk to, to dream with¯¥</b> Besides, your mother was a powerful woman that did great things when she wished to."
Hermione sniffed and turned back to scan the party, and Harry watched this with some awe and a slight shame- he¯²d never been interested enough to wonder what his mother had done on her own¯¥ only worried about his parents together and how that had happened and gotten the biased view of a marauder who liked to break the rules.
He took in a deep breath and looked away from her, his tongue feeling oddly thick and his voice small as he swallowed. "Do you think she'd be proud of me?"
Best AU AU HHr : Naked Heart by
Set in World War Two. The Death Eaters are Nazis, and Hermione is stuck in
France. Harry gets her out... after the war, Ginny - well, the woman
is simply evil, alright? Angstsy, features H/G and Dramione.
A regular AU is HP-related,
while an AU AU is one where HP characters are transplanted into
another domain. This particular fic would be pretty darn close to
commercially sellable without any copyright issues whatsoever if a
simple find-and-replace was done on the names.
Most I'll Think Of A Category Later Fic : Belong to Nowhere by Sweet-Lemmon
This would be listed under the Most Backstabbing Ginny category, except that there are too many
of those kinds of fics to count and I don't know how to choose between
Hermione is Harry's friend, and will do anything for him - even while he accuses her of turning Dark while she brings back his dogfather from the dead. Highly bitchy Ginny. (³Quidditch is the wizard sport, Hermione," said Ginny. "It²s our greatest entertainment. You don²t understand because you are a muggleborn. You weren²t born in our world like me and my family neither do have magical parents like Harry's... don²t get me wrong, but I think you don²t REALLY belong to our world... He [Harry] cares about you, of course! Ron too. But they know that you only think about your studies. They had already accepted that you²re not a funny person. I love you, Hermione but you are boring! I am sorry but it²s true...")
Best Post-Hermione Fic : Survivor by Atruwriter.
What happens to Harry when Hermione dies at the Final
Battle, from the point of view of Ron. It's the only fic where I have
really respected Ron - and you know I normally hate the git.
"Stop it," Molly shouted at Ron, waving her hand for him to quit making excuses. "He's your responsibility. He's your best friend! All this time you've been here, you haven't tried to talk to him. You haven't tried to pull him out of it. You've been letting him fall deeper and deeper into this. You're just waiting, aren't you? Waiting for him to finally die!"
"Mum," her sons exclaimed, looking at her, shocked.
Ron looked up at her, "Yes," he admitted.
"What?" Fred and George asked, stunned.
"I haven't talked to him. I haven't tried to make him feel better. I haven't offered him meals or tried to talk him into Chess," Ron agreed. "I'm waiting for him to die....I'm doing it because he's my best friend."
Best Vampire Fic: Forever Knight by DeliverMeFromEve. A classic.
This is followed by Blood Bound by Dementor149.
Harry gets turned, then turns Hermione. She's not amused. He needs her to help him find the Horcruxes. Fine, she says. Just as long as you kill me once we're done and Tommy's kaput. Fine, he says. But it's not fine...
At half a million words, this is probably the definitive Vamp!Granger fic. If not considered a classic yet, it's getting there.
Most Tragic HHr Fic : Fallen Angel by Sunny38.
I'm not kidding when I say this is tragic. Regular HHr tragedies either have unrequited or hidden love or have one of them dying (it's not a tragedy if both die) and the other feeling sad the rest of their lives. This is closer to the last option, only much much worse.
Angstiest with (probably) a happy ending Fic :
: 'Boys Dont Cry' by tearsofher.
Actually, the full title of this category is '"Angsty HHr fics where you 'want to rip the characters heads off and
strike their authors into permanent labour before impaling them and
roasting them alive over a slow flame' with (probably) happy endings".
Nastiest Manipulative Dumbledore HHr Fic : Too many to name:
(1) I won't forgive you by CodeWarrior.
Hermione and Harry joining Voldemort to rescue Hermione's parents
from Dumbledore's clutches. Hermione tends to take the initiative e.g. joining Voldemort, 'breaking the taps',...
They sign a magical contract with Voldemort to cement their alliance; Hermione makes sure to add a small print footnote that says any Death Eater who calls her a Mudblood loses a finger. She collects several.
Massively and unapologetically AU. Super-Harry, mostly male writing, mature audience. Britain falls to Voldemort. Harry et al fight back from their base in Ireland.
Best Hermione-rescues-Harry fic : Resistance. by lorien829. Note that Books 3 (maybe 2) to 5 in canon can be all be classified as Hermione-rescues-Harry fics. Of course, the rescuing is often mutual, which is why some of us wonder why Jo is so delusional about her HBP ships.
Fairiest HHr Fairy Tale : HP Boy Who Lived Saga by Cindra, plus sequels.
The amount of resurrections is rather amusing... you have to be a die-hard HHr to read and enjoy this as it's often over the top. Definitely worth starting, though.
Best Muggles Vs Magicals Fic : Muggle Summer, Wizard's
Fall by canoncansodoff.
Post HBP. The British Muggle government
takes care of all its citizens. That includes Muggleborn wizards and
witches. They come to Harry and Hermione with a proposition - "We'll
knight you two, make Harry the Queen's Wizard, and provide lots of
financial and MI5 and technological resources to help you kill
Voldemort... and you kill Voldemort."
Best Adoption Fic : Delicate by SaoirseAngel. HHr. They are asked to adopt a little girl. Chaos and life ensue.
Snarkiest Hermione : If life gives you lemons... throw them back! by FuryOfMedea. At least it starts off snarky. If I had a category for whodunnit, it would be a nominee. Hell, I just wanted it included...
Funniest HHr Oneshots: Where do babies come from? by BewitchedOne.
Also see Wrestling Parents by swishandflick31
Best Differently-Abled!Mione Fic :
Standing. A vicious attack by Muggle bullies at primary school
left Hermione deaf and with trouble speaking. She still goes to
Hogwarts, and becomes friends with fellow outcasts Neville and
Luna. This is a Harry-POV fic where he tries - after finally
noticing her - to observe and understand her.
Caution: some of these fics may ship Harry with Ginny. But they won't get much airtime, so you can rest easy.
(Have I mentioned that if you prefer HG to HHr, then you really need to go flush yourself? And yes, I do mean down a loo. Ah, blissful intolerance...)
Best Hermione/Cedric Fic : This ship is probably the best kept secret of the Grangerverse: the Medicine Wheel has a good set of Cedrione fic recs.
Finding Himself by Minisinoo.
This is one of THE best Hermione fics out there - thanks to
KatieFromAnchorage for pointing it out to me! Basically, it's OOTP
with the following two changes:
(1) Cedric survived GoF, and (2)
The characters of Cedric and Hermione are not one-dimensional. Hermione isn't always right. Neither is Cedric nor Harry. (Ron's given short shrift, which is how things should be.) Cedric and Hermione care about each other greatly; yet they disagree on House Elves and hurting others. Meanwhile, the Ministry and Umbridge aren't just out to get Harry and Dumbledore - they want Cedric's arse too. Adult Chapters later on. The most fascinating OC is Cedric's Slytherin mother (who approves of Hermione, and still yells at her and her son when they aren't sneaky enough).
(You have to admit (if you don't, you're simply wrong) that Cedric is the hottest male character in the HP movies. Though Equus!Dan is a strong contender. Sorry, I need to stop salivating here.)
"I know everything about you, Hermione," said Cedric. "I even did my Muggle Studies essay on Dentists and their Ways so that I know what to talk about when I meet your parents ...."
"So uh, Cedric is it?" Tonks drawled. "What form does your Patronus, take?" she asked him flirtatiously. "A silver wolf," he said, clearing his throat and glancing down in a hunted fashion as Tonks came and stood very close to him, looking him up and down admiringly. Moody nodded in approval. "Excellent. You're so pretty I was afraid that you were going to tell me it was a French poodle. Silver wolf is good".
Best 'Hermione Time Travels to MWPP Era' fic : Too many to name.
(1) This Time Around by DisneyDoll0424. Remus/Hermione.
(2) Hermione The Werewolf Tamer by atruwriter. Remus/Hermione, with Sirius doing an excellent Ron impression.
Albus stood, rather stunned. He never once thought to question her
actions, and certainly hadn't even considered the notion that she was
simply a grieving widow come to save one and only one person from the
future. He could see, very clearly, that Hermione Lupin was a woman
who had set out to change the whole course of things. She was here not
for herself, but others. And it was perhaps the fact that she wasn't
looking out for herself, even after the loss of her husband and best
friends, that encouraged him to the fact that she was quite remarkably
the most unselfish person he'd met. "I have no doubts in you,
Mrs. Lupin, I assure you. I understand that it will be quite hard to
see your husband every day, especially however many years younger."
(3) Phoenix Past Changer by cylobaby. Remus/Hermione.
(4) Shattered Time by Rachey. Hermione is willing to do absolutely anything to let Harry have a family.
Best Hermione/Snape : see my LJ list for full details, here's just a list of titles and authors. There are too many contenders here to mention, because most of the fanfic writers who ride this ship tend to be adults or mature humans capable of writing excellent stories. It's been suggested that that's because there's so much baggage to overcome in this ship that only the best writers have a go at it.
Best Hermione and Bella Become Friends Fic : Women On Top by Maddy-Riddle.
The Minister decided that the war was nothing more than two factions, or rebels, fighting each other, so both sides should pay for the deaths they had caused. So now, Death Eaters and Order members were sharing cells in Azkaban while the Minister gloated in his office about how clever he was. And that's how Hermione came to share her living space (a three by three metres cell with two mattresses, a sink and a toilet, and a barred window with a beautiful view of the ocean) with none other than Bellatrix Lestrange. ... their partnership began the first time they planned to attack one of the guards to steal more food. Their complicity grew as they started planning bigger things. Like taking over the Wizarding World...
Best Hermione/Tom fic: Take My Heart away by Hatusu. Angst, much... even more than Romeo and Julian I mean Juliet.
Most Manipulative Dumbledore : History Reversed by Hermione's Equal. Also Tomione.
To eliminate the Voldemort problem, Albus decides to make sure
Voldemort never arose in the first place. He sends Hermione back in
time so that she's classmates with Tom Riddle. The twist: she's a few
months old at the time.
This is NOT a nasty!Dumbledore fic. It is, however, extremely
manipulative. After reading it, you will still not be sure if he did
the right thing or not. After all, all the manipulation achieved was save the world...
Best Hermione/Charlie fic: Only in the World of Dragons by Atruwriter.
When Charlie met his girlfriend, not for the first time, he hadn't expected anything to come out of it. She was seven years his junior, brilliant beyond measure and had a strong attitude in her that could either make her sexily bossy or a nagging hag. She came to the colony to learn about dragons and figure out if it was a career worth pursuing, knowledge was her sustenance. She wanted to know everything about everything and while it was admirable, Charlie wasn't exactly interested in using his dragons as her lab experiment. Surprising them both she grew fond of the giant and moody lizards and worked to become a dragon keeper herself...
... while Hermione had a hard time relating to the women, she fit right in with the men. She picked up her usual mother-like position and before long the men were looking up to her like she was their faux-girlfriend. When upset, they crashed Hermione's tent to spill their feelings without being ridiculed. Charlie had the misfortune of walking in on a sodded dragon keeper as he cried on Hermione's couch about how his girlfriend had broken up with him through owl post and quickly exited before anybody saw him. Hermione was the resident emotional baggage holder. She listened with the ear of a thousand understanding women, doling out advice when needed, but mostly just supplying soothing tea and a shoulder to lean on. The men didn't admit to each other that she was reliable when things were tough, that she was the first to be informed when things were going good or bad, but it was a well known fact.
Best Hermione/Dean fic: The Great Hogwarts Electricity Debate by Lucy Lupin.
Ok, it's the only HGDT fic I could find, and it's just a oneshot. But seriously, Dean/Hermione is a MUST (Major Underexplored Ship Thing).
Best Dramione Fic: For some reason, there is this huge ridiculous conspiracy going around that says that Draco (or Tom Felton) is cute. This is wrong. Draco may be smart, but ... cute? He's got a face that only a mother jellyfish could love, and that too only if said organism was blind. Anyway, there are several good DHr fics out there, based on the admittedly reasonable premise that if Draco's head was removed, cleaned up, and refitted, he would be Hermione's Equal.
(1) A Dragon Reborn by Ezmerelda
(3) We Learned the Sea by luckei1. Voldemort's most trusted Death Eater walks into Harry Potter's office and offers a deal to work on the inside to kill Voldemort. They need one more person to keep their secrets - Hermione. Trouble is, Draco Malfoy killed her parents. luckei also has some nice other fics.
(4) Summer With the Grangers by draco-severus-mmm a.k.a. Sam.
Most Enjoyably Confusing: Out of Time. by Rurouni Star.
AU of third year (and more, see sequels) with Hermione struggling
with the Time Turner and hiding a convict called Sirius Black. This isnt really HGSB (sequels may be) but there is much Hermione-Sirius interaction.
multiple memories floating around in her head, she's working herself
to bits - so hard that Sirius even does her Arithmancy homework for
her when he never took the subject himself. Suddenly, running into
oneself doesnt seem as important as remaining sane...
Best Magical Britain Bashing Fic Written By The Person Compiling This List
Harry took Ron on the Horcrux Hunt, leaving Hermione behind. She helped them anyway. When Harry and Ron chucked her into Azkaban after the Final Battle, she promptly pulled a Sirius, escaping and fleeing the country. She then wrote a book, a polemic against Pureblood Society. Ten Years have passed. British Mudbloods are leaving in droves. The Ministry is worried. They'd like Hermione back to stop the exodus. She thinks they are delusional.
Peppered with quotes from the book... "The pureblood Mudbrains think that Mudbloods should be kept out of Magical Society. They make a good point. Why on earth would we want to be part of it? Magical Society in Britain is like a dirty little pond contaminated with the excrement of the inbred three-eyed fish living in it.. Why would healthy fish like us want to swim and choke in it when there's the ocean of the Muggle world available to us? Not to mention more civilized Magical societies."
Best Harry Bashing Oneshot : Where the Heart Is by darkgoddess2002.
Harry betrayed Hermione. After several years, he discovered the
truth. He wants her back. For some strange reason (called 'Harry is a
bloody idiot'), she doesn't think that's on the cards.
Best Hermione/Salazar : When Past and Present Collide by Rebecca Pierson.
Best Ghost!Mione : Unfinished Business by Ramos. HGSS. Thanks to a manufacturing error, Hermione dies in a Potions Accident. Much mourning ensues. Then she turns up again - transparent.
These fics may involve ships, but they are not the focus of the story.
Most Original Fic Worth Reading : Dementors by Myranya.
If you read it, you will understand why. There is absolutely no way, no way at all, that anyone except the person who wrote it could have come up with it. It's the kind of idea that hits someone once every fifty years or so. It starts with Hermione in Azkaban. She does what no human as ever done before - she tries to communicate with her Dementors guards. They respond... an intriguing account of Dementor physiology and society.
Most Thought Provoking Oneshot : Unsticking the Shadow by Pogrebin.
For just three thousand words, this fic is bloody scary.
'The Daily Prophet is the only newspaper that sells on September 1st, 1998... the statement released by You-Know-Who [says that he] has a Muggle father... Hermione thinks there is something almost Shakespearian in the way that Voldemort begins his article by confessing his name and his heritage and ends it by using his own example to prove his point. Mudbloods are evil bastards, wizards and witches of the wizarding world - take a look at how I turned out... Voldemort has just placed himself on the side of the Muggleborns...Hermione meets Harry²s eyes and says, ³Voldemort has just destroyed us.´'
Most Realistic Azkaban!Harry Fic : The Perfect Azkaban
Breakout by pstibbons. (Hey, modesty was never my strong point.)
Traditionally, Harry goes to Azkaban unjustly, is betrayed by
nearly all his friends (sometimes including Hermione, which is nearly
as ridiculous as HBP), gains super powers, and gets out by himself. That's unrealistic. So I broke each of those cliches - here, Hermione and the Order break Harry out of Azkaban.
Harry had wanted Hermione to be Secret Keeper, but she had refused. It was important to keep the secret until he died, and she might die before him ("What if I get knocked down by a Muggle bus, Harry? Or blown up by televangelist terrorists? Or choke on a Marie biscuit?").
Best Hermione Granger Meets Lily Evans fic :
The Prefects Portrait by Arsinoe de Blassenville.
Hermione ships with no-one, Lily ships with Draco. Hermione uses the Darkest of Magics to return Lily Evans (not Lily Potter) from the dead... and then she can't tell anyone. This fic has a nasty scary ending where the Purebloods win. I hate Lucius - so will you. Excellent interaction with Snape.
Most Super!Hermione : Forgotten Past by Jamesite.
Hermione formed the Ministry of Magic and trained the Founders. Can't get more super than that. Crossovers with LOTR (at least).
Best Hermione is Buffy Fic : New Life Meets Old Life by dozygirl.
No Harry/Ginny or Ron/Hermione fics pollute the listing below. some
HHr fics are listed here because most of the attention is on Harry
rather than Hermione.
The Sacrifices Arc by lightningonthewave.
Lightningonthewave is easily the most prolific author in the Potterverse. She began Book 1 in September 2005 and finished Book 7 in January 2007. Sixteen months, seven books, three million words. (In contrast, OOTP has 250 000 words.)
And we're not talking about throwaway writing either. Her version of Magical Britain is far, far more developed and consistent than Rowling's.
It starts out as the cliched Sibling-Who-Lived fic, but soon becomes a story of such complexity that any praise I give will be an understatement. I normally detest Harry/Draco (as it is sooo uncanon, not because of the slash) but this is my only exception.
Year 1. Saving Connor : 79 000 words. Harry's twin Connor is the Boy Who Lived, and Harry is devoted to protecting him by making himself look ordinary. But certain people won't let Harry stay in the shadows...
Year 2. No Mouth But Some Serpent's. 165K words.
Year 3. Comes out of Darkness Morn.. 273K.
Year 4. Freedom and not Peace.. 490K. H/D starts here.
Year 5. Wind that shakes the Seas and Stars. 770K.
Year 6. A Song in Time of Revolution. 696K. (Excellent ending.)
Year 7. I am also Thy Brother. 534K.
My major gripe with this saga is that there isn't enough Hermione time. But what is there is good - and the Smith-Granger pairing is one of the most intriguing pairings in fanfiction. The author must have Fae blood. Or Elf blood, it's not like I'd be able to tell.
Also classified as 'Fic I Most Wish I Could Hate'. I've tried,
really I have. I normally think Harry/Draco is a joke. (The slash is
fine, but the idea... dunno way, I mean, I like Dramione, so what's wrong with Drarry?)
Best HHr Sibling-Who-Lived Fic
Unsung Hero, by
MeghanReviews. Harry gets a lot more face time than Hermione, though.
Harry's in Ravenclaw, Hermione's in Gryffindor. The Boy
Who Lived, Daniel Potter, is the twin who doesnt kick ass but gets the
credit for it. This is very Harry-centric, but I still look forward to
(Of course.... my Yet Another Sibling Who Lived Fic wins the prize for Most Ridiculous title in this category. But I abandoned it...)
Abandoned, but good while it lasted. No Hermione. Harry's parents try to kill him when he is turned into a vampire as a baby. Remus runs away with him. What can possibly go wrong when a poor single werewolf tries to raise a snarky hyperactive vampire? Nothing at all. As long as you don't count that field full of vampirized moomoos. Or that...
Most Ranty HHr Fic : Parallels by Bobmin.
AU, literally - Harry jumps to a different dimension after a Pyrrhic last battle. SuperHarry and (understandably) meek Hermione. Excellent scenes of Draco torture. Also good for Ginny haters. Not to be read by those who dislike fanfic written by male writers. (I usually don't, but this is a good fic for when you don't need to think.)
Most Independent Harry : A Life Alone by LoonyLivesOn.
No Hermione. The story starts out with the
premise that Petunia and Vernone never married and that Petunia and
Lily were good friends. She raised Harry as a son... till he was
eight. Then she told him the story of his life and what Lily told her
- that he is wanted by both Voldemort and Albus and should avoid
both. She is promptly killed by the Order and Harry becomes a
streetkid, going by various names... and eventually attends Hogwarts as Jeremy Hart.
Not for those addicted to happy endings.
Best Harry Adopts Tom Fic : Altered Destinies by DobbyElfLord.
Everyone is dead except Harry. He goes back fifty years to kill a
boy Lord Voldemort. Then he changes his mind and adopts Tom Riddle
instead. (No Hermione.) Story of a young Tom growing up with full
knowledge of how his alternate self had grown up.
Niamh O'Feir is a Muggleborn witch sorted with streetkid Harry
into his father's house at Hogwarts. The 320K main story has nearly
200 (short) chapters, covering Years 1 to 7, and there are sequels and
prequels. Terion's effing brilliant. Niamh O'Feir, a.k.a. Lady Hex, is
easily my all-time favorite fanfiction character. Also on ff.net. Hermione's alright
and ships with someone other than Ron. Early chapters could use a beta, but the plot's cool. Besides, I like the name Niamh.
Best Discworld Crossover : Harry Potter and the Color of Magic by Chardvignon.
HHr. Hermione's husband is sent to the Discworld to learn how to become a cop. In the meantime, Rincewind comes to Hogwarts.
"Well, I suppose it won²t make much of a difference if you perform accidental magic on Discworld," Professor Vector said.
"Because their Ministry of Magic can²t detect it?" Harry asked.
"Because if you perform some accidental magic on the Discworld, your entire body will explode into about eight million particles simultaneously at the speed of light,´ Vector said, happily. ³The resulting explosion would be about fifty or sixty times greater than that of the largest nuclear explosion in the history of Earth. You won²t know the difference, of course, since you²ll be too dead to care."
Funniest Harrycentric fic : Make a Wish by Rorschach's Blot.
Harry spends a summer travelling around Europe and the rest of the world in an attempt to have a decent holiday before Voldemort kills him. In the process, he unwittingly creates a legend - Mr Black.
Best Snape Is Harry's Dad Fic : Prometheus Bound by Dius Corvus.
HHr. Albus sends Harry to Privet Drive, where he is shot, blinded,
and tortured. He escapes, only to be sent by Umbridge to a secret
prison where he is raped. By the time he is rescued, he doesn't want
to trust anyone. A story about emotional recovery, magically living
with blindness, and ending up in Azkaban.
The author says, "The obvious parallel is that Harry is
Prometheus, with all his troubles stemming from the tyrannical Zeuses:
his relatives, his father, Voldemort. And though he at times nearly
succumbs to the pressure, he persists..."
Any Harry/Ginny is minor. No Ron-Hermione of course, we're not uncivlized.
Most Original Ship : Salix Narcissa by marginaliana.
Willow/Squid. Nuff said.
Best Time Travel From Future To Present : Beyond This Place of Wrath and Tears by Talriga. Snape-centric.
It's hard to believe that Talriga's a teen. I bet she came back in time as well and is really a 35 year old in a 15 year old body or something like that. (Tallie, if you're reading this, that's a bloody compliment.)
Snape fans should also check out the fics Christina Teresa's Victoria Stanley.
One of the few survivors of a Death Eater attack on the French Magical
School Aquitaine, Viviane Deveraux makes the change from French
nobility to English criminal underclass easily. She meets and allies
with Remus in his inter-Hogwarts years (Witch
Meets Werewolf), teachers Foreign Defence Techniques during
Harry's third year (Foreign
Defence) and DADA during his fourth year (Strange
Choices in a Mad Season), and has a love-hate-love relationship
with Severus Snape (Once
More, With Feeling). Her familiar, a falcon named Malhereuse, is
aptly named. Possibly the most formidable OFC ever written, even if I
like Niamh O'Feir better, since Viviane has far more to recover from. And much as I love Hermione, Viviane is tougher.
Funniest Founders Fic : Founding Hogwarts by Sylvie Moonbeam.
Four barely graduated teens start up a school in Scotland. Godric/Helga and (if they ever get around to it) Salazar/Rowena. The latter are remarkably Dramionish, only funnier. 9 out of 10 for snarky dialogue.
'Helga! Look at his [Sal's] face - isn't that a face you'd trust with your bunny rabbits? Or villages, for that matter?'
'Ro, he wouldn't hurt bunnies or village folk... He'd turn the village folk against each other and begin a civil war, then provoke the bunnies into a bloody uprising against the surviving villagers and force them to crown him as their leader!'
Tonks investigates the disappearance of Percy Weasley since he
terminated Cornelius Fudge's career. Appearances by the Weasley Clan,
Penelope Clearwater's sister, Oliver Wood, and a Muggle clinical
psychologist. Also includes the answer to Tonks' question of why Percy
chose to do ministry paperwork instead of, say, joining Auror
Best Quidditch Fic : Love on the Quidditch Pitch by Tess.
This was abandoned, but it's still nineteen chapters of hilarity.
It's the story of the legendary week-long 1953 match between the all-witch Holyhead Harpies and the Heidelberg Harriers. The only canon character who makes an appearance is Arthur Weasley, who's a toddler with a formidable mama. Perhaps the passage below will explain much of the Weasley psyche that was later described by JKR.
"Cybele Weasley was the sort of woman who had received letters from
the Ministry asking her not to escort her elder daughter to King's
Cross Station in future. It was not so much that Cybele disliked
Muggles as that she was intensely fascinated by them, and desired
nothing so much as to learn more about them. Muggles found it
strangely alarming when people started Apparating out of thin air and
trying to explain the principles of Quidditch to them. The Ministry
lived in fear of the day when Mrs. Weasley would be left childless and
alone in the house with her husband. The prospect of Cybele Weasley on
the loose without runny noses to wipe had been known to make grown men
at the Department of Accidental Magic Reversal break down and sob."